True Love, According to Zeus

The original human nature was not like the present, but different. The primeval man was round, his back and sides forming a circle; and he had four hands and four feet, one head with two faces, looking opposite. He could walk upright as men now do, backwards or forwards as he pleased, and he could also roll over and over at a great pace, turning on his four hands and four feet, eight in all, like tumblers going over and over with their legs in the air; this was when he wanted to run fast… [The sexes were not two as they are now, but originally three in number; there was man (made of 2 male parts), woman (made of 2 female parts), and the union of the two (one male and one female part). But the primeval humans] made an attack upon the gods [and Zeus said]: “Methinks I have a plan which will humble their pride and improve their manners; men shall continue to exist, but I will cut them in two. [Apollo] gave a turn to the face and pulled the skin from the sides all over that which in our language is called the belly, which he fastened in a knot (the same which is called the navel).

After the division the two parts of man, each desiring his other half, came together, and throwing their arms about one another, entwined in mutual embraces, longing to grow into one. Each of us when separated is always looking for his other half..And when one meets with his other half, the actual half of himself, the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy, and would not be out of the other’s sight, as I may say, even for a moment: these are the people who pass their whole lives together. And the reason is that human nature was originally one and we were a whole, and the desire and pursuit of the whole is called love.

My Long List of Hmm’s…

A “Hmm” is defined as a person of the opposite sex who catches your eye and makes you consider hmm, he has possibility.

Going to Emerson I had heard that most of the boys here were… gay. But I didn’t know it would be this bad. My first week during orientation I was actually getting kind of worried over the fact that every guy I was meeting like Bette Midler and Broadway way more than me.

As the weeks went by, it got better – class started and I got to see more and more of the Emerson population and all the “potentially” straight guys that go to this school too.

Nothing against the gays, really, it’s just kind of awkward when you meet a guy and you have to at first assume he’s gay until he proves otherwise.

Whatever, I’m just going to have to out-source or claw myself a man. It’s seriously a dog-eat-dog world out there in this lovegame against other Emerson girls, because for every 10 of us, there’s only 1 straight dude. I can’t win with those odds!

Now let’s see, there’s the black dude from the elevator I made smiles with, the skater I had poignant eye contact with and the stand-up comedian in my journalism class that just sulks all day… They are all very decidedly cute and hmm-worthy, but I’m just not good at making the first move or even getting them to talk to me.

And I know I’m not ugly, homeless men on the street regularly call me beautiful when trying to get me to give them money, so I know I’m not hideous and I would consider myself quite the catch – so what am I missing here?

I’m getting desperate and I’m lowering my standards. For example, I have crushes on dudes that when I am in heels I am actually taller than – and I am finding that perfectly acceptable just because of the fact that hey, he’s straight and it could happen if I was drunk enough on cheap beer.
The buck stops here. Things must change. I WILL get myself a man.

Color My World

We all have our hobbies that we do whenever we’re stressed or just want to step away from our current circumstances to just plain escape – I’m no different. But what I choose to do with my free time might just be a bit different from the way you unwind.

Now to say I enjoy coloring would be an understatement; I love it. There’s something about starting off with a drawing with blanks just waiting to be colored and ending with a perfectly shaded piece of art that I can now ticky-tack onto my dorm wall that just makes me happy.

Seeing as how I have a minimal amount of homework and a shitload of free time I now have this little corner of my  dorm room where I post up all my completed works and show off to all who comes into my room for whatever reason.

Most are not as impressed as I would like them to be.

During my most recent trip to the Museum of Fine Art I hounded through their gift shop and bought a Frida coloring book in the kid’s section. What the Museum was doing selling Frida Kahlo’s controversial paintings to children I have no idea, but it was just my luck to have found it.

I guess coloring reminds me of those times when I was younger when my Mom and I would spent hours together drawing and having coloring contests (which I’d always win, naturally).

Point is, anyone who’s seen me in the zone when coloring a butterfly or dove knows when I’ve got a crayon in hand I’m a different person – calm, chill and destressed. And these days, living with six girls has me more stressed than a stretched out rubberband. I need to keep in the lines.

UPDATE: As of October 11th 2009, I am now the proud owner of a 64-pack of Crayola Crayons… This is heaven.

Columbus Day Weekend

Normally three-day weekends make me sick with pleasure and possibility over just how much fun and sleep can be had within those particular 72 hours of vacation, but this year things are a bit different.

See, I’m alone. Well, not completely – but for the most part, all of my friends have jumped ship and fled home for the weekend.

Coming from Texas where plane rides home cost around the range of 400 dollars one-way, going home for a random weekend is out of the question… So, here I am.

Living on the 14th floor of my building, straight shots down the elevator are rare and are usually more of an annoyance/bother than anything else, but this weekend I’d gladly take a random elevator ride with a stranger than be so alone all the time.

Today I slept in until 5 P.M. only because there was absolutely nothing else to do. I got dressed. Ate by myself at Boloco. Attempted to go to the library only to find it closed.

And now here I am again, back in front of my computer, creeping on the randomest of individuals on Facebook and bathing in my own patheticness until I buy some more episodes of 30Rock or MadMen, only then to pass out from exhaustion at around 4 A.M.

I’m not unsocial. Really. Already only a few paragraphs into this post I’m wondering whether or not to just highlight all I’ve just typed and press delete; worrying about what any readers will judge or surmise about me based on these emo blog post.

But no, I will post this son of a bitch. Why? Because at least I’ll have one blog post come out of this weekend, and that my friends, is how I measure my productivity.

Here’s to hoping this never happens again,

Cassy